The Fascination that IS other people.

I read a book in one day this past weekend.

"Angry Conversations with God: A Snarky yet Authentic Spiritual Memoir" by Susan E. Isaacs -- completely changed my life..so much revelation....I mean, like "The Shack" - level revelation here. Such a good read....but, anyways.....

I have been wanting to write a book.

But, now I'm struggling with the whole fact or fiction. Do I want some literary genius like "The Shack" which is fiction, but revolutionary and revealing... or autobiographical like Susan's book, but still just as revolutionary and revealing.

Jury is still out.

But, in Susan's book, I saw why I love reading autobiographies, blogs, etc.... I love people. I love how they view things. I love the stories of their journey. I love learning things from them.

The next day was Sunday and I was in the overflow room at church. There are probably two revival groups in there and I commented to my friend, "Oh, it's sad that I can walk in here and not know absolutely anybody when even last year and the year before, I'd know millions (haha) of people." But, I sat around and glanced at the faces and realized how interested I would be (literally, this is not a joke) to read the "memoir" of each person.

You see, I find myself to be absolutely incredible. I find myself interesting and my story thus far to be absolutely breathtaking. And, sometimes, when I look at my more shallow friendships and some of the things we do together or talk about, i WILL stop and think, "I wonder what they would think if they knew ____ about my life." How would they look at me differently? Would they value this information?

All I know is people can learn from me. Their life could change because of something I've been through and them knowing how I handled it and then seeing me now...

My words are powerful and important.

I know this because it's true of everyone I see around me.

People just absolutely move me.

But, I still want to write a literary masterpiece that causes an uproar and makes an impact :)

i.e. "The Shack".... Francis Chin....even frideeken Dan Brown with "the Da Vinci Code"....

I like to challenge people. I like to go outside the norm. I like to dream and I like to do what people think I shouldn't because it scares them....but, it doesn't scare me. Yes, that's right...

I'll go there.

Narrowing Down Dreams:Starting with a Vision.

I don't remember if they did this in first year at Bethel or not, but, in second year, we had to make a list of 100 dreams we wanted for our life. It could be absolutely anything...owning a boat to igniting revival in the entire world. Well, maybe a bit more narrowed down than the latter (but could/would lead up to such).

I never finished mine.

i think i had 15.

I don't even know where my meager list is now.

I don't think I even saved it in my binder...at all...

I think I just did some to keep my homework up to date.

That's not the right attitude for something so brilliant.

I wonder if I did it now how many of those would be short term that I could accomplish with my next income tax return... a new external hard drive. A new windshield for my car.

Are those really DREAMS or just random things I want? Whereas an actual dream that is a WANT for me would be something like always having the most up-to-date digital camera...I still have never gotten my digital SLR camera.

I thought maybe if I tried to broaden it a bit, it would help me to narrow it down to 100 specifics...yes, a year after I was assigned this, I am doing it of my own accord.

I think one thing I'm scared of is writing down 100 dreams that I'm not even sure I really want...they're like "maybe dreams." Example of one would be getting my PhD in Psychology...at this point, I'm wondering where finishing school fits into my life or forseeable future even.

The overall dream of my life can be summed up in one word.

Bet you thought it'd be revival, ay?

It's LEGACY.

Revival has never survived longer than one generation. We have studied that at Bethel. So, yes, I am interested in revival and reformation. Like legit revival and reformation...not the fun, revolutionary words that stir up your heart....but the actual action and longevity of real revival and reformation. But, these things are tied in with legacy. If you ignite revival and reformation with legacy on the brain, you are thinking forward. You are thinking about future generations. You are thinking about the betterment of what you will never see. I want future generations to live out of revival and reformation that I sparked...but, I want it to be so impactful that it changes things and lasts...so, my legacy will never be an idea or a former flame of hope. It will be a living organism that is constantly recreated and regenerated...so, the legacy lives on.

What cliche can I use to make my point? A starfish that multiplies when you cut off an appendage and doesn't die...so what looks like failure creates greater success...the "failure" is short-term and after the greater success could never even be termed a failure.

A star...something that has "died" a million years ago but is still shining bright.

I don't need cliches.

I just need a plan.

So, I'm starting with a vision.

There's this old song by a contemporary Christian group named Truth called "Living Life Upside Down." My dad used to sing this song often.

These lyrics have always gripped me since my parents made me go picket at abortion clinics:

"We’ve got a program for saving the Earth

While unborn children are denied their right to birth

One baby blessed, another cursed

Well have we made this world better or worse

Now that the life of a tree comes first

You say we’ve risen to a new age of light

You’re telling me what used to be wrong is now right."

I don't think the world is getting worse. We live in this great technology age. We are constantly moving forward. It's beautiful. It's empowering. It's the greatest evidence of the evolution of the human mind. Ideas build on top of each other at great speeds.

What IS getting worse is the mindsets of the world. Maybe you can't even term it "worse" but term it "the same." How are we the same as the barbaric times of Bible stories?
Quite simply, it is this:

We don't value life.

Who are the people who make a difference? They know all they have is this one life. They don't skate by. They don't struggle to survive. They have vision for doing something great.

If we valued LIFE, we would value the lives of those around as well as ourselves. Most of us don't value OURSELVES, so that impacts everything we ever do. The deadbeat guy that walks out on his pregnant girlfriend.... He's not valuing the impact of life he created. He doesn't see how important HE is to this baby and to his girlfriend. If he understood how amazing and important he was, he wouldn't walk out. (Well, and he probably would understand how amazing and important SHE is and draw her up to that knowledge too and would provide her with commitment, safety, love,etc)

That's just an example. Yes, everything is wrapped up in God and everything is wrapped up in love. But, one thing that moves me beyond all movement is the beautiful wonder that God wants to go along for the ride.

People view God as dictator and have a very warped view of sovreignty. Over the past probably six months I have had so much insight on how God wants to be given a place in our lives. What is the most important word in that sentence?

God? yes....but, no: GIVEN.

Funny how people can believe that salvation is a choice, but they can't believe God moving in our lives is also a choice. He created this giant bubble for us to live on and dominate and wants to be invited to make it great. But, He will also stand back and let us do with it what we will....same with our lives. If our salvation isn't something forced on us, why would people think that miracles are forced on us as well? That's what prayer is for... Prayer isn't us just talking about what God's already doing...... it's inviting Him to change things. Otherwise, if God was already going to do these great things, why would we have to ask Him to do so? I wonder what people think prayer really is.

Prayer is like a ball rolling.

I see it as some things God is already orchestrating because somebody already set that ball into motion. God is doing miracles in people's lives that didn't ask....saving somebody from dying, providing financially....but what makes you think that someone else didn't ask Him? Someone that was partnering with Him 100 years ago...they prayed for their future generations. Somebody set it into motion for you. Look at their legacy...you're reaping those benefits.

So, some people don't like to pray. They think God's already doing these great things...but, we matter in this equation. HE PARTNERS WITH US AND OUR IDEAS! What are we going to now set into motion? Which ball are we going to continue rolling? If people were to value prayer, what could they change? What new ball could start rolling that would rock this generation?

You have to pray it because 100 years ago, they didn't know what we know. But, they started the ball rolling.....

Keep it rolling.

Change things.

Because of what you start, 100 years from now, they'll be pushing the ball you started rolling...something new that will be built on what's new for us now.

Chapter Eight: Discerning of Spirits

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

Supernatural discernment typically divides that information into four different areas:

1. the working of the holy Spirit

2. the working of the demonic

3. the working of the human spirit

4. the working of heavenly beings

Many believe that discerning of spirits is the ability to know another person's secret sin and have used it as justification for harboring attitudes of suspicion, criticism, and accusation.

Ephesians 6:17 "...the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."

In the spirit, words equal swords. So with our mouths we also wield swords. We can use our words with the Holy Spirit as a scalpel to bring healing and restoration into the lives of others, or we can use words in a destructive manner that spiritually stabs and injures others. "Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing" (Proverbs 12:18).

In healing...the words that have been spoken against them need to be renounced, rejected or condemned (see Isaiah 54:17).

Where there is a lack of prayer, complaining will fill that void.

1 Corinthians 13:5, "Love keeps no record of wrongs." Most often, suspicion is built on a record of some sort, whether from firsthand experience or secondhand gossip from someone else. If we are going to look at people through Jesus' eyes, then we can't be carrying a record of wrongs and suspecting wrong of others.

Ultimately, if your discernment is going to be supernatural, you have to be humble enough to let the Holy Spirit change, guide, and direct you.

Chapter Seven: Questions about the Angelic Realm

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

When you act in faith, you are stepping over into the things of the Kingdom realm -- healing, prophecy, miracles, discerning of spirits, and so on.

Until our perspective shifts to seeing ourselves and each other properly through God's eyes (we are higher than angels...1 Peter 1:12...we are the ones with divine nature and a mind of Christ 2 peter 1:4, 1 cor 2:16), we will still be overly impressed with those who have seen angels and operate in the Spirit realm. The spirit realm needs to be demystified and understood by the "average" Christian, keeping in mind that the average Christian is much more amazing than we have been made to believe.

Chapter Six: The Unseen Realm

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 corinthians 4:18

Many New Age leaders teach about experiences with the unseen realm....Only those who are legally accessing the unseen realm are having true experiences and should be listened to as those who speak truth.

Chapter Five:Prophets and Seers

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

God talks to seers and prophets in different ways; then they take those messages and declare them to the Church to bring vision, direction, and encouragement.

The Hebrew word for prophet means a suddenly inspired person. The word implies one who bubbles up, one who flows forth.

The Hebrew word for seer is one who receives communications from God more from visions and dreams than audible words.

Chapter Four:We Can All See. You Can Learn

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

...a sign of all mature Christians is that they will be active in using discernment.

We must operate our discernment through love.

Chapter Three:Impartation

The School of the Seers by Jonathan Welton

"Revelation always brings responsibility, and hunger is the thing that prepares our hearts to carry the weight of that responsibility." -- Bill Johnson

Our character must be able to uphold the amount of power we carry, or else we are a danger to those around us...Not everyone receives the same level of anointing in impartation. God knows what you need, and what you can handle.

If you possess it, you can impart it.

Let it rain.

The most defining moment of my life was coming to Bethel.

Sometimes, I wonder if anything I will ever do will have such an impact as what Bill Johnson and Kris Vallotton have done.

They have answered a call that impacts thousands of new people every year. Even just by the fact that at least 1,000 students do first and second year at BSSM every year.

I know I am in a season of rest and it won't be that way forever...but, I just don't know what to do now. I'm literally merely twiddling my thumbs it seems. My discernment and prophecy has intensified and heightened even in this season...but, for what? Those close to me don't listen to me...they don't value my words...in essence, giving the Holy Spirit and myself a big middle finger...

What does it take to have people value your words?

The people closest to you....so it's not that a prophet is least accepted in their own country....what makes you accepted in your own country....when the words are hard....

So sad that so many are willing to turn away when I'm just trying to help...

I've never turned away when someone gave me a hard word...

It doesn't really hurt...just makes me apathetic towards my relationships.

That's not how I wanted to start a new year....

Won't be how I end it.

I promise.